Nonviolent Communication and Conflict Management

• Think about any disagreements, or conflicts, you have recently experienced or are currently experiencing at work with a supervisor or colleague, or someone in your personal life. Share at least two strategies you have learned about that might help you manage or resolve the conflict more productively, and why these strategies might be effective. For example, could you suggest a compromise? Could you look for a broader range of solutions to your disagreement? Could you use some of the principles of nonviolent communication or the 3 R's to better help you resolve this conflict? I have recently been having some squabbles with  a friend of mine. He is actually an ex-boyfriend who I have stayed very close friends with. We had some communication issues before we broke up and we have been working on solving these issues. Though we are closer to where we need to be, we are not quite there yet. Our two biggest issues is I don't like to open up for fear of rejection and he has a short temper. Sometimes we will be trying to communicate and my lack of wanting to open up will upset him and make him lose his temper, making me shut down and retreat even more, which then makes him more upset and he starts yelling, calling me names and get volatile. One of our most recent disagreements is the fact that he always wants to talk on the phone and I don't like talking on the phone. Sometimes I feel trapped when we are talking on the phone because that is when he gets upset with me. I would rather talk in person or text message each other. One strategy for me would be to possibly compromise and agree to talk on the phone, but maybe I could agree to do this and then if things escalate to a place where I am not comfortable, I can tell him we need to get off the phone and if he does not listen then I will just hang up the phone. The other strategy I would consider trying would be for us to possibly write things down before we come to each other to talk about them. Sometimes I literally need to visual and see what I want to say before I can actually say it to another person. I also think this would help because he and I tend to interrupt one another a lot. We have both acknowledged that this is a problem, but we have not really been able to figure out how to solve it yet. I think implementing the principles or nonviolent communication or the 3 r's would definitely help our situation. I specifically think the 3 r's could help us and would help.
  
• Also, if appropriate, ask your colleagues for their input and advice regarding, if not specific problems, how they have learned to be more effective communicators as it relates to conflict resolution skills. I would be more than happy to hear any advice offered by colleagues. One of the more important lessons I've learned so far in this class is the fact that everyone communicates differently. I've also learned that our experiences certainly effect how we communicate. As a result of this, I realize the importance of making compromises to communicate more effectively.